


Wherein Chairs and Buckets are Vital to Keeping Merlin’s Secret...So is Dancing

by BabyGenius



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, But it could be if you squint?, But only to Gwaine and Percival, Crack, Fluff, Gen, Gwaine Being Gwaine (Merlin), Gwaine Helps Merlin, Gwaine Knows About Merlin's Magic (Merlin), Humor, Magic Cover-Up, Magic Revealed, Oblivious Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Other, Percival Knows About Merlin’s Magic (Merlin), Protective Gwaine (Merlin), Protective Percival (Merlin), So does Percival, That three-way relationship isn’t actually a thing, kinda not really tho
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:33:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25572154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BabyGenius/pseuds/BabyGenius
Summary: In his attempt to distract the man, Gwaine had slammed his head on a metal bucket (don’t ask how, the details are a little foggy) (and just what kind of bucket is made of metal, anyway).Now, this meant he succeeded in distracting the man—he had been so suitably distracted by Gwaine’s clear idiocy despite being a knight, that he failed to see the lanky manservant sneaking out of his room.——Gwaine knows about the magic. These are his ridiculous escapades as he tries to help Merlin protect Arthur, without actually letting Merlin know that he is helping. Percival also helps Merlin, just in a different way.
Relationships: Gwaine & Merlin (Merlin), Gwaine & Percival (Merlin), Gwaine/Merlin/Percival (Merlin), Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin & Percival (Merlin)
Comments: 30
Kudos: 96





	Wherein Chairs and Buckets are Vital to Keeping Merlin’s Secret...So is Dancing

**Author's Note:**

> I’m back! This is my second Merlin one-shot, though if y’all wanted me to do a follow-up with Merlin and Percival’s perspective on things (Merlin being confused, Percival being motherly/caring), then let me know and I’ll add a couple more chapters.  
> Gwen is ridiculously absent in this and I hate it, because I failed the lamp test and that sucks, but I’m going to try and get one out where she doesn’t even come close to failing the lamp test.  
> Also! If you like funny Merlin stuff, my previous Merlin one shot was about the woodworms. It has Arthur falling out of his chair, the chairs collapsing from underneath the knights, and Agravaine getting his just desserts. It’s called The Woodworm Conundrum, check it out!: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25117264
> 
> EDIT 02Aug2020: Thanks to AslansDaughter reviewing with a wonderful idea, I will be adding a second chapter. I’m going on a trip in a few days and will have iffy wifi connection, so you may have to wait two weeks, but it’s definitely coming!

Gwaine knew about the magic. To be completely honest, he was kind of surprised that no one else knew, especially Arthur. I mean, come on, when he met them in the bar fight Merlin had been using magic to fling plates and stuff around. That’s not very subtle now, is it?

However, then he had been banished, so Gwaine figured it wasn’t his problem anymore (at least for the time being).

Then, the man on the bridge had said the thing about “Courage, Strength, and Magic”. Now, while Courage very well could have been Merlin (to live in the castle of Camelot and constantly save everyone’s lives with magic? Merlin was either incredibly stupid, or incredibly brave….maybe a mix of both, actually), but Grettir had implied that Arthur was Courage. Maybe Merlin could be Strength, but Gwaine most certainly wasn’t Magic, so process of elimination wasn’t that hard.

But he’s getting off track.

When Arthur became king, though, and Gwaine was welcomed as a knight, it was then that he knew he would have to help Merlin at least a little bit. He wouldn’t tell Merlin he knew about his magic, but would wait until Merlin felt like he could trust him enough to tell him himself (and if he didn’t, well…it might hurt a little, but ultimately he understood). (Although, if he took forever then Gwaine would take the initiative, because Merlin had been alone with his secret for too long now.)

Gwaine also understood that Lancelot knew about the magic, though he never confirmed it outright (of course he wouldn’t).

This led to many adventures for Gwaine. Some of which made him look like the fool many thought him to be, but he was fine with that so long as he was able to protect Merlin.

——

His first time helping Merlin had been during the quest in the Perilous Lands, but the first time he helped him in Camelot was because of an assassination attempt (go figure). Gwaine could see Merlin out the corner of his eye as he was sitting at the Round Table in a dreadfully boring meeting about border patrol routes or something (of course, he was paying attention, but it was still mind-numbingly boring).

Merlin was trying to get to the servants’ exit in the back of the room, no doubt to stop the assassin that had been lurking about the castle for the past day (Gwaine had tried to take care of her himself, but she was impossible to find, damn it). Unfortunately, Merlin was unable to do it in a way Arthur wouldn’t notice, and was getting kind of antsy with worry.

Gwaine heaved an internal sigh of frustration before pretending to fumble in his chair, sending it crashing a few feet back on the floor (hey, he was _talented_ ) and him sprawling on the floor. The knights stood up in concern before bursting into laughter once certain he wasn’t harmed. Leon only smirked, his eyes twinkling, and Percival’s eyes looked at him knowingly. Which was weird, because what was there to know? (He couldn’t know about the magic too, could he? … Actually, scratch that, it’s not like Merlin or Gaius were particularly cautious (why would you yell about magic—which is illegal on pain of death—when the door to one of the most frequented places in the castle was wide open? That was just stupid.))

Merlin had darted up the servants entrance and then come back down a few minutes later before anyone but Gwaine noticed he had gone, his hair a little tousled and his crooked neckerchief hastily straightened.

Gwaine returned his halfhearted attention to the patrol routes. Success. He was good at this.

——

He was not good at this.

Okay, maybe a little good. This was probably just some very unfortunately timed bad luck. Gwaine had tried to help expose the latest evil-doer and had instead not only indirectly knocked Merlin out, but had also somehow tied both himself and the evil-doer together. This was not making for a fun time.

Fortunately, the two were tied back to back, and Gwaine would bet that having armor dig into one’s back was not at all comfortable for the evil-doer, but his predicament was still rather frustrating. It wasn’t just normal rope—no, that would be too simple—it was magic rope. Every time the evil-doer tried to use magic to break out it would burn red-hot. One would think the evil-doer would realize continuing to use magic was futile, especially considering it was _their own magic rope!_ but no. No they did not.

“Would you give it a break already!” Gwaine snapped. “Are you really this stupid!”

The evil-doer snarled. “I am Rhydian, and I have come to kill Uther Pendragon! Nothing will stand in my way!”

Gwaine shut his eyes in exasperation. “You—are you really this stupid? Uther Pendragon is dead, boy. You’re about a year too late.”

Rhydian froze before stuttering, “N-no I’m not! You’re lying! Uther Pendragon is alive and it shall be I that will be his doom!”

“Another old wizard beat you too it. I dunno what to tell you.” Gwaine gave his best attempt at a shrug. Rhydian was silent as Merlin began to stir. “Ah, Merlin! Fantastic timing! Think you can get a knife to cut this rope?”

The magic rope protected against sorcerous attempts to break it, but not against good old-fashioned sharp objects.

——

Other times, Gwaine helped in much less noticeable ways. Like when Merlin got hurt. He told Gaius that Arthur had given Merlin the morning off. Then, he collected Arthur’s breakfast and brought it to him himself. He gave him a nice wake-up call of rolling him off the bed by stealing his covers from underneath him. “Good morning, Princess!” Gwen had already left the room to do Queenly stuff.

“ _Gwaine?!_ ” Arthur sputtered, sifting up on the floor in bewilderment. “What are _you_ doing here? And where’s Merlin?”

“Gaius has Merlin collecting herbs for the morning, but you’ll get him in the afternoon. I trust you know how to dress yourself, Highness? I’ll leave your breakfast on the table.”

Arthur was too confused and still trying to get his bearings by the time Gwaine left.

Later on, neither Arthur nor Merlin mentioned the morning to each other, so they didn’t realize that anything out of the ordinary had happened. Gwaine smiled to himself. Maybe he was getting better at this?

——

Only slightly better. Just a smidge. Not as better as he thought, but it was a work in progress.

Though, he had figured out that Percival most likely knew and was helping in his own way, so that was something he would need to talk to the friendly giant about without directly talking about it (oh what a tricky line he walked). His brain already hurt thinking about it.

Getting back to the point, though. He had tried to help distract someone so that Merlin could slip past them and plant the appropriate evidence that would allow Arthur to actually believe Merlin’s allegations (the fact that he never did, even though he claimed to trust Merlin with his life—not in as many words, but it was obvious—frankly made Gwaine want to beat some sense into him. Alas, he had to refrain.) However, in his attempt to distract the man, Gwaine had slammed his head on a metal bucket (don’t ask how, the details are a little foggy) (and just what kind of bucket is made of _metal_ , anyway).

Now, this meant he succeeded in distracting the man—he had been so suitably distracted by Gwaine’s clear idiocy despite being a knight, that he failed to see the lanky manservant sneaking out of his room.

Gwaine wished he had managed that distraction with less pain to himself, but it was no worse than a hangover, so he would live.

——

The confirmation of Percival’s knowledge of Merlin’s magic went a little something like this.

Gwaine was holding a man who was trying to poison the manservant in a headlock, blowing his hair out of his face with a puff of air. Percival had walked in on the scene and raised a single brow. “So you’re helping with—?”

“Yep, you?”

“Of course.” Somehow they both knew what the other meant. Don’t question it, it’s better some things go unknown.

The man in the headlock was dreadfully confused. All he knew was that, in order to properly kill the king, one had to get rid of the manservant first (he was one step ahead of most assassins since most did not realize that small fact). Gwaine tightened his hold on the man’s neck before Percival came over and clocked the man in the face, dropping him like a sack of grain. Gwaine shared a glance with the other man, giving him a solemn nod of thanks.

Percival returned it and then walked away, and they never spoke of the exchange again.

——

Gwaine soon discovered that Percival’s way of aiding Merlin was a little more subtle than falling off of chairs on purpose or slamming one’s head into a metal bucket. Arthur’s armor would turn up spontaneously polished without Merlin doing a thing, primarily on the nights where he knew Merlin had been particularly busy.

Or Merlin somehow getting the best of the food for the servants despite being the last to the kitchen most times.

Or the horse already being tacked and ready when they needed to leave and Merlin had been stuck packing and getting other things ready.

Maybe it was having an already halfway full pile of timber by the time Merlin got back from filling the waterskins.

It might have been in the way the dishes always seemed to wash themselves if Merlin left them alone for more than a few minutes.

Suffice it to say, Percival’s contributions were less obvious, and less physical or confrontational, but they were still valid. Maybe even moreso than Gwaine’s. Merlin always seemed to be more relaxed when Percival helped him, even though he didn’t know who was doing the things for him.

——

It all came to a head one day. This time, it wasn’t an assassin, nor was it a magical creature. This time, it was a regular man who had seen Merlin exiting a room where a flash of light had erupted. The man, obviously, cried sorcery, causing Merlin’s cheeks to blanch white as bleached parchment. Even though there had not been an execution since Arthur’s ascent to the throne, that did not mean that magic was in any way legal.

Merlin had gotten no better at excuses, and Gwaine bemoaned this fact as his mind raced. He and Percival caught each other’s gaze. Gwaine tried to convey, _Leave it to me_ , and just had to trust that Percival understood.

Percival did not understand.

“We were making out.”

“Dancing!” Gwaine and Percival both shared a look with Merlin and then with each other as both Merlin and Percival’s cheeks flushed red. The rest of the knights gaped at them, at a complete loss for words. Gwaine, of course, was the one guilty of saying they were making out, but Percival’s addition of dancing was just the icing on the cake, really. There was no way the knights wouldn’t think of that as weird foreplay or something, but it was too late now.

Gwaine cleared his throat. “Yes. All…three…of us, were dancing. One of Merlin’s mixtures fell out of the bag he was carrying and it created that bright flash of light, no sorcery involved.”

Percival nodded jerkily, saying nothing else. Merlin was content to gape along with the others.

Arthur coughed, distinctly uncomfortable. “Ah, yes. Well, um. Make sure it doesn’t get too out of control next time. Court dismissed!” He seemed very perturbed, and everyone scrambled to rush away, though a few of the other knights (led by Sir Kay) gave appreciative wolf-whistles and smacks on the shoulder.

Gwen offered Merlin a sympathetic smile, though her eyes promised that they _would_ be talking about this later, before she turned and strode out after Arthur.

——

What came next had been a very awkward situation. Merlin had held onto his forearm awkwardly, staring at the ceiling as though he wished he were anywhere but there. “So, ahem, were you…?” He couldn’t finish the sentence, shifting his weight from foot to foot.

Gwaine scoffed. “Honestly, mate, your _abilities_ are not at all hidden all that well.”

Merlin flushed when Percival gave a nod of agreement, his cheeks still slightly pink. Gwaine looked at the two of them before grinning mischievously. “So I guess this means we’re in a threesome now, doesn’t it?”

“Gwaine—” Merlin sputtered. Percival just sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“What! After my comment of making out and Percival saying _dancing_ , of all things, there aren’t many other things people can think! We’re totally in a threesome to keep your cover now.”

“Gwaine,” Percival protested.

Gwaine turned around and walked off, his fingers in his ears. “ _Lalalalala_ I can’t hear you, _darling_.” He threw a roguish wink over his shoulder before darting out of the throne room, causing the other two to give chase with cries of protest and outrage.

 _Yes_ , Gwaine thought, _that was handled nicely indeed_.

**Author's Note:**

> So, what’d you think? I thrive off of comments and kudos. Even if your comment is just one word (“fantastic” “good”), I will still appreciate it immensely. As a creator, there is nothing better than receiving positive feedback on something you worked hard on. If you didn’t like it, tell me why! I cannot promise I’ll fix everything (if I constantly went back to edit this it would get tiring and become a nuisance), but I like to know why people don’t like my stuff.  
> Also, if any of y’all are in the Batman or White Collar fandom, I have a series published as a crossover for that, so check it out! I just finished the most recent work in the series and I’m working on the next one (so for those of you who already follow it, don’t worry, it’s still being worked on!).  
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> Also, if y’all wanna check out my tumblr for story updates and stuff, my username is @blerghfish, so there ya go!


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